wasting time

Since more than a year ago, I record my every learning history. Even this English writing practice. I assign 20minutes for this actually. Also, I record the history of Computer Science learning, reading a book, learning English, etc. The aim I do this now is a little bit obscure now surprisingly while it was obvious at the beginning. Now, I'll consider about this habit and maybe find drawbacks or good points, and fix it.

First, the aim of this. I think I started this because I wanted to make the abstract learning effort visible. When I started this, I was really into learning English. For example, I did more than 6 hours a day. However, English is something you use, and I didn't have a lot of chance using it, I was uneasy about the meaning of what I did. And by visualizing it, in the form of time, I felt better because I could feel like I did whole this!!, this is gonna bring me something good. This is one of its good points. However, there is a bad point of course. Now the learning history is visible that I know how much I did at the end of the day. This means I can compare it with that of other days. Since I am a little bit a perfectionist that I felt I lost on the day when the total amount of time is much shorter than other day while it doesn't matter. However, from a different perspective, this would boost my willingness to do more. But instinctively, I recently think this is stressful. Stressful because I am ruled by something that is not essential.

The essential point of learning is quality rather than quantity. I know it is not completely proportional to the amount of time I spent. Of course, more I study, more I get better. But I think it is time to pursuit quality learning experience since there are so much amount of things I want to learn. I it simply impossible to learn them all doing in a way I do. I need to be clever.

In conclusion, as of now, I don't stop this. Because it is not that complicated and painful habit. And I see more benefit than disadvantage. I think I am still at the stage that I needs constant effort of learning that require certain amount of time spent for learning on a daily basis. And this habit is helpful for this. But in the near future when the time is ripe, I will be at the stage I use what I've got so far that requires so much creativity and passion, and more quality pursuit in learning, I am gonna stop this habit. Because what I need at that stage is the quality of what I did rather than how much I devoted myself.